Last weekend I had an AMAZING mastermind retreat in Charlotte with my twin sister and friends. In addition to getting a ton of clarity in my life + business (and planning out my work for the next year) I also realized just how much I still struggle with Imposter Syndrome. No matter how much money you make or how many people tell you how amazing you are, women, especially women of color still struggle with owning our brilliance.
Here are 7 ways to overcome Imposter Syndrome:
7) Recognize when you’re experiencing it: Imposter Syndrome is defined as a psychological phenomenon where people doubt their accomplishments and have a persistent internalized fear of being exposed as a fraud. Despite external evidence of their competence, they remain convinced that they don’t deserve what they’ve achieved. So many of us chalk up our success to luck, people being nice, or as one of my clients said when she received an award recently, “They must not have had anybody else to give it to”.
6) Progress not perfection: As a recovering perfectionist, I used to struggle with putting my ideas into the world unless they were perfect. What I know now is that there is no such thing as perfection and that it’s really just a form of procrastination and self-sabotage. Deep down we think that the more perfect we can be, the less we’ll be criticized or judged by others. Instead of seeking perfection, remind yourself of just how brave you are for putting your work into the world and that you can start now and always improve later.
5) Establish a no comparison zone: Growing up with an identical twin sister, I ALWAYS compared myself to her. In our 20’s I used to feel like she was more of an adult than I was because she was married with a family and owned a house. What I didn’t realize was that she was comparing herself to me and wished that she had the freedom that I did. Within the last few years, it’s been so beautiful to see how we’ve realized that we are BOTH more than enough and instead of comparing our journeys to one another, we inspire each other to play bigger and bigger every day.
4) Stop using your degrees and start using your gifts: I can’t tell you how many times I’ve thought about going back to school. Last year I even started applying for a master’s in political management and my friend was like, “Ma’am, why are you going back to school for something you’ve been doing for 20 years?” What I realize now is that I wanted the validation. The stamp of approval that I knew what I was doing. Do you know the definition of an expert? It’s someone who knows more than 80% of the population about a subject. I bet you’ve spent YEARS mastering your craft so consider this me giving you permission to call yourself an expert. You’re welcome :).
3) Stop f”aking it till you make it”: About 10 years ago I was in a fellowship for women of color executive directors and I shared how I had no idea what I was doing and that I was just “faking it until I made it”. The facilitator stopped me and said, “What a disservice to the other young women, especially the women of color, who are coming up behind you. They are going to think that there’s something wrong with them when they don’t have it all figured out”. Since then I’ve taken this phrase out of my vocabulary and encourage other women to do the same.
2) Do it afraid: This has become my personal mantra because as I take bigger leaps in my life and career, I’m realizing that my dreams scare the shit out of me. The people you admire who are soaring past you are secretly afraid too, but they are leaping anyways. Learn to use the fear as fuel and watch how it transforms your life.
1) Start before you’re ready: There is no such thing as ready. You’ll never be ready to quit your job and become your own boss. You’ll never be ready to sell all of your shit and travel the world. And you’ll never be ready to run for office. You just have to leap. As a recovering overthinker and over-planner, I spent YEARS getting ready for shit that I was still unprepared for! But that’s where the magic exists. I learned soooo much about myself during each of those adventures and wouldn’t be who or where I am now without all the bumps and bruises.
Rebecca
P.S. If you’re ready to overcome Imposter Syndrome and surround yourself with other badass Black women who are living in their light, apply for the Fall 2019 Cohort of the Live In Your Light Bootcamp. Over the next 3 months you’ll get the clarity to discover:
– What truly lights you up and how to do the work you love every single day and ACTUALLY get paid for it
– How to break the destructive patterns and limiting beliefs that are keeping you safe, stuck, and broke,
– And how to show up in your life as your most authentic self so you can attract everything that is waiting for you
